Back in 2008 (fine, OK, I'm slow), Cracked did one of their famous lists on The 7 Crappiest "Super Heroes" in Comic Book History. Well, fine, there are plenty of lame, lackluster and just plain odd superheroes. You never know what will catch on. I mean, for this list, the prime criteria seems to have been a lame origin, and if we're being honest, Spider-Man?
But number two on Cracked's list is the world-famous Elongated Man.
Really? The only hero you could find crapper than Ralph Dibny was the Black Condor? The man who taught himself to fly?
And the number seven entry that begins the feature is Madam Fatal? The out-of-work actor who fought crime dressed as a little old lady? This is the company you think Ralph should keep?
And the Whizzer is crappy because he gained super-speed due to a transfusion of mongoose blood, but Plastic Man isn't, because he gained his powers after being splashed with acid in a burglary gone wrong? Isn't that also the Joker's origin?
Clearly, that which does not kill us makes us Super Friends.